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For someone who's immortal, Never Dead Ned manages to die with alarming frequency, he just has the annoying habit of rising from the grave. As Ogre Company's newly appointed commander, Ned has only six months to whip it into shape or face an even more hideous assignment, but that's not the worst of his problems.
A. Lee Martinez delivers his first short story collection, featuring ten original tales based on his previous fantasy and science fiction novels. If you're a Martinez fan, this collection is surely something you've been waiting for. If you're simply Martinez curious (and who isn't?) this is a great sampling of strange worlds of fantasy featuring talking gorillas, sensible housekeeping kobolds, cosmic monster gods, and world-conquering space squids. These all-new, all-different tales are available for the first time.Within you'll find tales of werewolf versus bigfoot, ogre versus wizard, and rock alien versus romantic entanglement. You'll experience a terrifying descent into madness via pizza delivery and the existential angst of the gods of death. You'll discover why it's a bad idea to feed the pixies and why it's a good idea to always bring along a magical broom on your adventures.A collection eight years in the making (and worth every year), Robots versus Slime Monsters might not actually have any stories where a robot fights a slime monster, but it does feature a gorilla wrestling a lion. And in the end, isn't that almost as good?
The wizard Margle the Horrendous takes special pride in never killing his enemies. Instead, he transforms them into various accursed forms and locks them away in his castle. His halls are filled with his collection of fallen heroes and defeated villains, along with a few ordinary folk who were just unfortunate enough to draw Margle's attention.It's Nessy's duty to tend this castle. It's a lot of work, but she manages, taking pride in housekeeping talents that keep the castle from collapsing into chaos. But when Margle suddenly dies, everything begins to unravel. Nessy finds herself surrounded by monsters, curses, a door that should never be opened, and one very deadly dark wizardess.Nessy doesn't have might or magic on her side; she's just a kobold: short, furry, and sensible. Her allies aren't much better: a voice without a body, an angry fruit bat, a monster under her bed, a wizard in a jar (or some of him, anyway), and a one-eyed, one-horned, flying, purple, people eater. It would be smarter to walk away, but taking care of the castle is Nessy's job, and that's just what she intends to do.If only she could find time to polish the silver while beating back the forces of darkness.
Constance Verity - soon to be played on the big screen by Crazy Rich Asians superstar Awkwafina! - is still saving the universe, one crisis at a time - but now the rules have changed.
The final part in Constance Verity's epic adventure: saving the world is easy. Everything that comes after is the tricky part. Look out for Crazy Rich Asians superstar Awkwafina as Connie in the major movie adaptation of the first book.
Soon to be a major motion picture starring Crazy Rich Asians actress/comedian Awkwafina as Constance Verity: the girl who's been saving the world since she was seven.
Unspeakable horrors inhabit the Earth in this hilarious new novel from the author of Divine Misfortune.
"Fans of Douglas Adams and Joe R. Lansdale . . . will happily sink their teeth into this combo platter of raunchy laughs and ectoplasmic ecstasy."--"Publishers Weekly."
She is beautiful, ageless, and cursed with an unfortunate appetite for human flesh. He is Wyst of the West, defender of the weak, sworn champion of decency, and avowed foe of evil. United on a perilous quest to save their world from an insane sorcerer, they must fight against the overwhelming temptation drawing them closer together. But can they?
A supervillain is on the run from an entire universe of enemies in this new comedy from the author of Chasing the Moon.
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