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Why Do I Do That? adapts the basic strategies of psychodynamic psychotherapy to a guided course in self-exploration, highlighting the universal role of defense mechanisms in warding off emotional pain. With easy-to-understand explanations, the first part teaches you about the unconscious mind and the role of psychological defenses in excluding difficult feelings from awareness. Individual chapters in the longer middle section explore the primary defense mechanisms one by one, with exercises to help you identify your own defenses at work. The final part offers guidance for how to "disarm" your defenses and cope more effectively with the unconscious feelings behind them. Psychological defense mechanisms are an inevitable and necessary part of the human experience; but when they become too pervasive or deeply entrenched, they may damage our personal relationships, restrict or distort our emotional lives and prevent us from behaving in ways that promote lasting self-esteem.
From the Publisher's Weekly review: "Three classic fairy tales-the stories of Cinderella, Snow White, and Rapunzel-get a more sinister retelling in this three-novella collection by Burgo. Cinderella grapples with depression and a sense of dread about getting what she thought she wanted, Snow White's mother hones her psychopathic tendencies to try to kill her daughter, and Rapunzel must deal with mommy issues and self-worth. Burgo creates strong narratives that add nuance and sophistication to these tales; the titular grimness manifests as sexual violence, rape fantasies, and ruthless seductresses."From the author of VACILLIAN and THE LIGHTS OF BARBRIN, these three novella-length tales explore psychological themes latent in the classic Grimm versions. Rather than presenting two-dimensional "good" heroines pitted against "evil" step-mothers, GRIM portrays fully realized characters grappling with shame and self-doubt, suffering at the hands of mothers best thought of as narcissistic in modern terminology. Due to their dark themes and some graphic sexual material, these tales are not for the faint of heart and are unsuitable for children.
Challenging widely-accepted views within the self-esteem movement, author Joseph Burgo argues that self-esteem does NOT thrive in the soil of non-stop praise and encouragement, but rather depends upon setting and meeting goals, living up to the expectations we hold for ourselves, and finally sharing our joy in achievement with the people who matter most to us. Along the way, listening to and learning from our encounters with shame will go further than affirmations and positive self-talk in helping us to build authentic self-esteem.Richly illustrated with clinical stories from Burgo's 35 years in private practice, Building Self-Esteem also describes the myriad ways that unacknowledged shame often hides behind a broad spectrum of mental disorders including social anxiety, narcissism, addiction, and masochism. -- Publisher description
"Burgo has developed a ... guidebook to help you 'spot narcissists out there in the wild' (Glamour) and then understand and manage the narcissistic personalities in your own life. Relying on detailed profiles, vignettes from the authors practice, and celebrity biographies, [this book] offers ... tools and solutions you can use to defuse hostile situations and survive assaults on your self-esteem should you ever find yourself in an extreme narcissist's orbit"--Amazon.com.
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