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I experienced some pretty painful times in my 40 years. Feelings of low self-esteem, uncertainty, and self-doubt took root very early on. I've struggled through every phase of my life: as a chubby child with self-esteem issues, as a teen mom trying to navigate college at an institution I didn't feel a part of, a young woman wasting time with men that reflected the poor image I had of myself, and as an adult grappling with the imbalance of power and privilege in my community and watching it unfold in every aspect of my life.I often found myself walking between two very different worlds. I existed in a space between the past and the present, and poverty and privilege. As I aged, the duality that I existed in grew larger and more complex. Some of those spaces I existed in were quite painful and very emotional for me. Some of the most painful moments of my life were prime opportunities for personal growth. I learned to make sense of the two worlds I existed in and used that skill to help connect, build, and manifest community, comradery, and a sense of purpose.
I started journaling consistently in 2019 but life got in the way, and I ended up doing what most of us do, sitting the journal on a shelf where it collected dust. Then the pandemic happened... and then we all witnessed the murders of Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, and George Floyd. I was overwhelmed trying to live through two social justice issues at the same time. As the world fell apart, I picked up my pen and began to write. Journaling was a way to help me process my thoughts, put my fears and frustrations in writing, and express my hopes and dreams for a better world. This journal is your tool to manifesting your dreams and writing down what you want for yourself, your community, and the world.
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