Stand Up or Bend Over

This book is created from over thirty-five years of experience counseling people with their personal finances. I have not seen and heard it all, but I don't think I have missed much. I have had too many clients that were frustrated because they felt defeated, a failure and hopeless Add to that, the high probability that their marriage was suffering big time due to escalated discussions (arguments), and guilt. The title of this book has great meaning in the personal finance arena. If you don't STAND UP and be responsible, gain knowledge and apply it, develop a strategy to achieve your goals and commit to it, you might as well just BEND OVER and take the punishment. You will make your creditors smile. You lose! This book is written for the common person. I have tried to express everything in plain and simple language. I am not an attorney and strongly recommend you seek legal counsel for your situation if you feel you need it. I also strongly recommend you apply common sense while reading and as you begin to apply the principles embedded in the passages of this book. You will need to open your mind to some new thinking and conduct. Change will probably be necessary, as you cannot expect to get different results without changing your attitude, mindset and actions. Some things stand out as I reflect on the clients, their plight, their attitudes, their preconceived ideas, their relational stress and their plain dumb decisions with respect to their finances. I want to clearly state one of the cornerstones of my practice was, and is to this day, that no matter what brought the client to me, there was never any condemnation in my office. Whatever choices they made, circumstances beyond their control, just plain stupidity, a big ego, or anything else, we did not dwell on it. I want to tell you, the reader, the same thing. You will beat yourself up and other people will volunteer to do that. Don't do it to yourself and don't allow anyone else to do it to you. It is unproductive and a waste of time. Personal finances affect every dimension of your life. No part of your life escapes the impact of finances. I believe most people want to be good stewards of their money. The question is: How, when, and where are you supposed to learn? It's kind of like learning how to raise children. When you can least afford it and you have the least knowledge with no experience, you have children. It might be called on the job training. The intent of this book is to begin to equip you with some smarts as to how to do a better job, reduce the stress level and begin to move toward financial freedom. Unless you had unusual parents, you weren't taught much about managing money as you grew up. Childhood is over and you need to think like, act like, and execute your life like a responsible adult. You will not get it by osmosis and you won't get it unless you commit to learning the principles of budgeting, saving, setting goals and priorities and are determined to achieve your goals. As a couple or a single, you may want to seek out a mentor that will challenge you and help you stay focused. Regardless of what approach you choose, you must acknowledge that you need to make some changes. Determine to give up the way you have thought about money, the way you have not consciously and deliberately planned or prioritized what you do with your money. If you can't do this, close the book. Just continue doing whatever you have been doing and hope for the best. The material presented in this book is not difficult to understand and it is not impossible to achieve results. You will need to make some changes that will cause improvement and ultimately financial freedom. These changes will become obvious as you proceed through the pages of Stand Up or Bend Over.